SOMETIMES I WONDER!

Sometimes I Wonder!

Wondering, is very fascinating when it borders around the sweetness of life. I wonder, I wonder, like the fast-flying clouds above my head!

Sometimes, I get shivers running down my spine when I think of what could have been, the greatest tragedy in my life.

My eyes and emotions, sometimes; they fail to interpret what my mind is thinking.

Fear and the imaginations thereof, cripple your whole body after your brain has been taken captive by uncontrollable fear.

Nobody in all my life, not even my teachers: has ever told me that fear is fear no matter how narrow we try to limit it!

I really do not know why sometimes, it becomes almost impossible to rid myself of the repetitive thoughts circling my head like the irritating fly.

Sometimes, our thought patterns have the mind of their own. Just when you think you are commanding your surroundings, out of the blue: there comes the runaway train straight at your path!

Making it through the day should be the greatest to everyone who survived the day, count it victorious no matter how many times you have tripped.

Remember that when we were babies, the only way to learning to walk; was through falling. Determination comes as easy as breathing in and out from way back then.

Sometimes I wonder why, like all people of flesh and blood; I feel like quitting when things do not work my way. Life outcomes always work out like mathematic rules.

Addition has its own way, depending on the circumstances. Subtraction pivots back in a bitter sweeter way and leaves us wondering if it was worth all the pain.

Multiplication takes its course and disappears like water in our hands; when we exceed the need for everything we craved for.

Division is almost guaranteed to devastate our life and stability, thus sends us tumbling down from the mountain top to the valley below.

The rest is the total of all our frustrations, jumbled out into unrecognisable painful fragments; reminding us of what could have been had we exercised a little patience.

We find the pieces of our lives all scrambled into the bitterness of soul and the rottenness’ of bones!

Sometimes I wonder. If I could be able to slow down the velocity of my world, thus buy myself more time to gather new strength: and arm myself for all the difficulties experienced through the sandstorms of life.

Why I sometimes, find all the witnesses surrounding me on each passing day; not very convincing? The mirror, my shadows, my sight, and my hearing are all in agreement about my position except me, myself and I.

Delay, deny and dismiss; become the modus operand of my life, every time I argue with the reality staring my face. If dreams were crutches, I would have no excuse for all the failures due by me in my life.

Sometimes I wonder, if there are still people in this world who can still notice that I am still around and kicking; right there next to them?

Walking alone inside my shadow and minding my business, is the choice I made long ago. Many people puff and sweat, trying to find excitement in the company of snobbish individuals who don’t give a rat about their wellbeing!

Sometimes I wonder if there will ever come a day, when one goes to bed feeling 200% happy and fulfilled.

Yes, and yes again!

Sometimes, it is always a good thing for one to take care of oneself before everybody else! This remains my priority since the day I was born!

Talking to myself and all by myself is I, still making sense in every corner of my life.

 
Sometimes I Wonder Written By: Sydney Pikelela Gutyugwa
© February 13th, 2025
Featured Title Song: The Groove
From The Title Album: Bringing Back The Funk
Smooth Jazz Artist: Brian Culbertson
© 2008
DISCLAIMER
ALL COPYRIGHTED MUSIC VIDEOS USED IN THIS BLOG ARE NOT MONETIZED BUT, USED ONLY TO HIGHLIGHT AND ENHANCE READING: POEMS, ESSAYS AND NARRATIVES OF THE AUTHOR. I DO NOT OWN ANY MUSIC COPYRIGHT: ALL VIDEOS ARE USED WITH DUE RESPECT TO THE ARTISTS IN FAIR USE MANNER!

 

 

 

 

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